A recent study compared those who were cohabiting or dating to recently married people. According to the results, the latter group was generally happier. Moreover, they even reported better physical health. But that’s not all. Further findings suggest that while certain aspects of mental and physical health were improving prior to marriage, they began to deteriorate after the wedding.
In other words, nothing can beat the excitement of saying “yes” at the altar, but not many are prepared for what’s coming after. If you want to know what changes when you get married, read about it here.
What Happens When You Become Married?
Marriage affects different aspects of your life, including your emotional, social, financial, and even physical well-being. Even those who consider a wedding just a romantic event notice that changes are happening. What exactly is different? Check this list to find out.
“You” becomes “us”
👩❤️👨 One of the biggest legal changes when getting married is that many acquired items, such as a house, a car, or even small items, can be considered “marital property”. This means that anything purchased by any of you while being wife and husband can be divided between you if you divorce.
In some places, such as Massachusetts, even property owned before the marriage can be considered marital property in case of a breakup. Tying the knot often means giving up some rights to many things you own. If the legal unit crashes, how the property was acquired will matter since the marital property is usually divided fairly between the two spouses.
Less stress
😥 While the initial rush of passionate love in a relationship can be exhilarating, it can also cause a lot of stress. What changes when you get married? Your stress levels may go down. Sounds surprising, doesn’t it? In a healthy marriage, couples shift from a strong passion to a more compassionate and stable love. This is one of the best things about having a spouse. Remember all that racing heartbeat and foggy thoughts? Over time, however, this deeper love helps protect against stress. The brain releases hormones like oxytocin and vasopressin that strengthen the bond between partners. That’s when you feel an increase in the peace and security in the relationship.
Fights are different
If before you could consider leaving your partner after a big fight, now it’s more complicated. You cannot just pack your stuff and walk away. Of course, no one is holding you with chains when you are married, but breaking is more difficult now.
❤️🩹 Becoming a husband and wife involves crashing old patterns and dealing with various forms of paperwork. It’s not something to approach lightly or abandon due to a fleeting mood. Marriage means committing to the long haul, understanding that while there will be rough patches, the relationship is built to endure.
Longer life
🚴🥗 Having a spouse who shares your values and promotes healthy habits has an excellent effect on your mind and body. Couples often motivate each other to eat healthier and exercise. As they get older, they also encourage each other to attend medical appointments and follow medical advice.
On top of that, spending time together also brings wonderful benefits to mental and physical health. It’s related to that incredibly comfortable feeling of having a reliable and trustworthy partner which triggers endorphins. This type of hormone has healing effects on the body. As couples grow older, having a partner who knows you well can contribute to a longer and happier life.
Small and big wins hit differently
Being married means that everything you do becomes part of a shared journey. What you achieve individually is not just your success. But that’s a good thing! Now all your victories are something you and your spouse celebrate together with a big cake and a bottle of champagne.
🎉 Imagine completing a large project at work. Even when you were putting in the actual effort, your spouse was there cheering you on and listening to your concerns. Things like these are worth a lot. It works the same for smaller accomplishments. Say, you’ve been sticking to a new diet for a week or finished a book. These achievements prove that you’re both truly invested in each other’s happiness.
Long-term planning
When you get married what changes? A wedding is that point in your life when you know for sure that your significant other plans to spend the rest of their life with you. This gives you more reasons to think about your future together. For instance, you might start considering whether you want to have kids.
🗒 How about buying a house? Planning high-budget trips to some exotic destinations? Creating a shared bucket list? It’s not that you were not able to make any plans before you got married but now you can do it with more confidence.
Increased dependence
Maybe before marriage, you were used to making spontaneous travel plans with friends telling your partner about it a day before the departure. No big deal, right? After the special day, though, such decisions should rather be discussed with your second half. Take into account their feelings and schedules. Plus, remember to make sure you don’t have any plans together for these dates.
📌How does marriage work? Being an official unit means considering your partner’s interests and opinions whenever you make decisions, big or small. It is also related to finances. For example, if you want to make a significant purchase, you usually discuss it with your spouse first. It is necessary to ensure it fits your common budget and aligns with your financial goals.
Inheriting a family
👵👴 When you get married, your family becomes bigger, and it’s not just about your spouse. You may have wonderful, the best in the world in-laws. But that does not exclude the possibility that they can be difficult to get along with. As husband and wife, you will have to think about how to spend time with each other’s families.
Decisions about weekend visits, vacations, and holidays should be made together. You may need to figure out how to divide time between your families on holidays like Christmas or Easter. These decisions are not always easy to make. At times, they feel like yet another layer to how your lives change after the wedding.
Budget management skills become necessary
Creating a common budget is not a cup of cake. Often, dividing income and expenses can become a significant issue. This is especially likely to be difficult if you’re both used to managing your money independently. At this point, open and honest conversations about finances are everything.
💸 Is your partner better at creating a budget and tracking expenses? Let them take on those responsibilities. Of course, it is also possible that you’re both equally good with money. In this case, you could create a schedule to divide up the financial tasks.
Here is another idea. One of you could track daily expenses and bills while the other handles long-term savings and investments. Or you could take turns monthly to review your spending and adjust your budget together. There are plenty of methods you can use to avoid any financial conflicts in your marriage.
A new level of socializing
Getting married means getting to know the circle of friends of your partner better. That’s where the challenge comes. You may get along well with some of your spouse’s buddies. But it is also possible that you do not connect with all of them.
This is a new stage in your life together. As they say, you can’t choose your family, but you can choose your friends. It can be hard to pretend you like people you’re not comfortable with. Things like that tend to cause tension.
🥂You can manage this by discussing how to balance spending time with other people. Agree to give each other space to hang out with your most important friends without always having to be on your hip. Your partner doesn’t want to join you for a regular game night with your besties? Look for a way to make it work while still spending quality time together.
More legal rights in relation to each other
One of the frequently asked questions is, what changes when you get married legally? Nowadays, meeting couples who are not planning on ever getting married is not rare. “We are just two people loving each other and living together. Why do we need to write it on paper?” they often say. See, such opinions change quickly once an emergency happens.
📜You probably don’t want to think of such a possibility, but just imagine for a second that your second half gets into hospital with some serious injury. Unless you two are married and you’re considered a close relative, you will not be allowed to visit the person or be updated on their health condition. Being a husband and wife means you have legal rights to make medical and financial decisions on behalf of each other, especially in emergencies.
What Changes When You Get Married Legally?
It’s not just about the ring on your finger. Marriage leads to quite a few legal changes. When it comes to finances, property, decision-making authority, and legal benefits, your status matters. Here are some of the main changes you should expect after saying yes:
- Social Security and retirement benefits
Did you know that if you are married, you may be entitled to social security benefits based on your partner’s work history? In some cases, this changes a lot for one of the spouses. Moreover, certain retirement plans offer spousal benefits in the event of death.
- Health insurance and benefits
Many employers in the United States offer health insurance policies that cover a spouse. Yey, freebies! Basically, this means that after marriage, you may be eligible to join your spouse’s health insurance plan. Not only this can save you a pretty penny, but you may also get better coverage. Win-win-win.
- Tax filing status
Don’t rush to jump from happiness, you still need to file your taxes. However, married couples have the option to do it together. This way, you can get different tax brackets, deductions, and credits that can lead to tax savings.
- Debt responsibility
It’s not all just about benefits. Marriage normally impacts how debt is handled. It depends a lot on where you live. In some states, for instance, both spouses are responsible for debts incurred during the marriage. Attention: this is relevant even for cases when only one spouse’s name is on the account. This can include credit card debt, loans, and other financial obligations.
Do Things Change When You Get Married? — Final Thoughts
What changes when you get married? A lot. Marriage requires compromise and ongoing effort to build a healthy and happy relationship. On the other hand, emotionally, such an official unit often strengthens the bond between partners, giving both spouses a sense of security. These changes are going to improve the quality of your life by providing a built-in support system, a stable partnership, and the opportunity to grow together with your second half.
Maria is a writer who specializes in couples counseling and encourages people to become more intimate with one another. If you come across informative articles with personal viewpoints or research-based pieces that highlight the stages of creating healthy relationships, these pieces are probably written by Maria. The author emphasizes the importance of self-growth before seeking a romantic partner.